pounds & persistence

my journey toward fitness and wellness and faith

First Week- Tuesday

Weight: 255.4 lb

So, the scale says I’m steadily moving down, and I’m overjoyed at this! However, I’ve been a bit doubtful about my ability to be successful this time around, despite all the love and well wishes and support, given that I’ve tried so many diets in the past and have no real weight loss to show for those attempts. So at lunch yesterday, as I’m munching on my 5 point turkey avocado wrap, my friend Stephanie says “I know it’s hard to only lose 2 pounds at a time, but it’s the healthier way to lose weight and you’ll be able to keep it off. I really think Weight Watchers will work for you.”

To which I reply “Well, I tried it before and I didn’t have any success.”

And when she asks what happened I explain that eventually I got tired of pulling out my little cardboard slider to approximate points and that eventually I wanted to order a double bacon cheeseburger when we pulled into Wendy’s and just the idea of NOT ordering one was enough to reduce me to tears and that eventually I was sick of dressing in spandex and sweating a lot to run to nowhere in a gym full of people, so I stopped.

At which point, she looks at me and says “So, you gave up on the program, even though it was producing results and is supposed to be a lifestyle change. So basically, it didn’t fail you, you failed it.” Yes, this is exactly what happened, though had anyone but her said it, I’m not sure it would really have sunk in. And I am a little afraid it could happen again. So I’m thinking about all the things I’m doing differently this time around…

#1. Accountability. Which is equal to this blog and it’s readership. It keeps a large number of people who I otherwise wouldn’t be able to interact with regularly in the loop of my weight loss struggle. At any given time at least ONE of those people will be there to kick my ass should I start to falter. Big step.

#2. Daily weigh-ins. When I tried WW before, I only weighed in at the weekly meeting. If I missed a meeting for some reason, I weighed in at the next meeting, with two weeks in between. Which meant I was always surprised by my weight, sometimes positively and sometimes negatively. And the negative surprises just defeated me. So, when I weight myself daily, I know how I stand for that day and can either get fresh motivation to really work the program today and go to the gym or give myself a small pat on the back. The highs and lows are smaller, and therefore less volatile.

#3. Acceptance. Last time I did WW, I didn’t want anyone to know I was doing it. I was embarrassed about my weight and the fact that I even needed to do WW, that I wasn’t one of those ridiculously thin girls you see munching on lettuce and telling you that their natural metabolism is so fast they just can’t seem to gain weight. I always wanted to be one of those girls. It’s kinda embarrassing to admit I’m not. But this time, I made a blog about it, so everyone will not only know I’m trying to lose weight and doing WW but exactly HOW MUCH I WEIGH every day! I think I’ve accepted this about as much as a person can at this point, and I’m gonna rock that advantage until the pounds fall off.

Stephanie also said yesterday that she once met a WW leader who told her that she tried the WW system 3 times unsuccessfully before she finally committed to it. She lost all her weight the 4th go-round. So the point is, it’s ok if you’ve tried and failed the system before, it’s still an effective system and it’s still there for you to try again. Wish me luck!

C.C.

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3 thoughts on “First Week- Tuesday

  1. Kathie on said:

    I’m pulling for you! I remember one WW leader told us, when we asked, that it took her 5 years to lose her weight to which we all gasped! Of course we were all hoping to have this icky little problem solved in 6-10 months and be done with it! No one was thinking 5 years!. But her story was one of starting then stopping then starting then stopping until she succeeded. I won’t ever forget her honesty and truthful stance. This is hard and I am so encouraged by your courage. Thanks for sharing and keeping us posted.

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